Foundational Elements

PROBLEM: Defining the PROBLEM for relationships is critical (Chapter 14 – The Problem and 4 Mistakes That Cripple Relationships), because it prescribes a structure for identifying solutions. Most relationship “problems” are actually symptoms of THE problem. You will learn about the PROBLEM, where it came from and how it is connected to the judgments God has pronounced on men and women.

SOLUTION: The SOLUTION to any relationship problem (Chapter 19 - The Solution for Great Relationships, Chapter 20 – The Solution’s Fifteen Components) is straightforward, clear and simple to understand. This solution is so counter cultural, counter world, and counter self that it is easy to dismiss it as not workable. It isn’t counter common sense or truth, though.

FREEDOM: The solution is supported with the marvelous principle of freedom (Chapter 22 – Freedom and Choice). Freedom asks each person to stop making demands, remove your agenda and stop trying to change them. Freedom is so easily misunderstood, but actually simple in concept. When understood, it provides a beautiful blossoming effect to aid the Solution.

FORGIVENESS: The solutions is further supported by forgiveness (Chapter 23 – Freedom from Resentments, Bitterness and Grudges) which helps you get over the past and stop being controlled by other people’s bad behavior. Forgiveness is the gate that every individual or relationship must pass through if good or superior relationships are desired. Unfortunately, forgiveness is not effective for most, because few have an adequate definition and do not know how to determine if they have actually forgiven.

Overview

INTRODUCTION  You will see some questions that the course will answer, the two ways to live, the fundamental decision in life, and a 10 second summary of the course (Chapter 1 – Overview). Further, you will have an opportunity to assess your current relationships and consider some actions to start taking now to help them (Chapter 2 – Current Reality and Desired Future).

DIVINE DESIGN  Relationships work best when we understand the basics of men and women’s designs. God designed men and women (Chapter 3 – God’s Design for Excellent Relationships, Chapter 4 – Men and Women Are Different – REALLY!) and those designs are based on God Himself (Chapter 5 – The Foundation of Our Design). This will give you a new appreciation for how complementary men and women are in God’s creation. More importantly, you will see how those designs were created to reflect not distort the image of God. And, when you understand how God defines REAL men and women (Chapter 7 – REAL Men, Chapter 8 – REAL Women), you will see why the world creates such temporary and hurtful relationships.

DISABLING JUDGMENTS  Relationships became very difficult when God pronounced the judgments on men and women (Chapter 9 – The Unknown Judgment for Women, Chapter 10 – The Unknown Judgment for Men). The judgments are so effective, because God linked them directly to the way He designed men and women (Chapter 11 – The Link Between Designs and Judgments). Ultimately, the all relationships have suffered and the family suffers as well (Chapter 12 – Damage to Relationships and Marriages, Chapter 13 – Damage to Children and Future Generations).

ENSLAVING PROBLEM  The PROBLEM for all relationships is pervasive, everyone knows about it, but probably would not agree that it is the PROBLEM (Chapter 14 – The PROBLEM and 4 Mistakes That Cripple Relationships). It can be traced back to the Garden of Eden (Chapter 16 – The PROBLEM Started in the Garden). Tremendous insights are available by looking at what happened with Adam and Eve. You will even see that the original sin happened in the context of a marriage not done God’s way. This same problem is connected to and fuels the judgments (Chapter 18 – The PROBLEM’S Connection to the Judgments).

LIBERATING SOLUTIONS  The SOLUTION works for any relationship (Chapter 19 – The SOLUTION for Great Relationships, Chapter 20 – The SOLUTION’S Fifteen Components). Relationships that are lead by emotions cannot last because emotions are not trustworthy standards (Chapter 21 – Freedom From Being Emotion LED). Emotions are not bad, you are not to be emotion less, but acting on emotions is not the answer. The SOLUTION is further supported by Freedom, Forgiveness, and Confession (Chapter 22 – Freedom and Choice, Chapter 23 – Freedom from Resentments, Bitterness and Grudges, 24 – Freedom From Guilt). Additionally, no relationship operates well without a great structure that supports submission and authority (Chapter 25 – The “S” Word – Submission, Chapter 26 – Authority and Submission). And, when people decide to make the change they need to know the steps to transformation (Chapter 27 – Eight Steps to Personal Transformation).

ENABLING RESOURCES  In the last chapters we cover some significant topics and tools to help relationships stay strong, be warned of dangers, and provide means to regaining health.

  • Chapter 28 – Observational Listening
  • Chapter 29 – Creating the Relationship You Want
  • Chapter 30 – Three Relationship Elements (FIRO-B)
  • Chapter 31 – Divorce and the Bible
  • Chapter 32 – Two Biggest Problems for Marriage
  • Chapter 33 – Divorce Myths and Consequences
  • Chapter 34 – Blended Families
  • Young couple holding hands.
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